27 April 2012

Aqsa Sharif dan Saya

Jumuah mubarakah.

Perkiraan yang dibuat, keputusan yang diambil. Ayuh! Kita mengorak langkah memacu perubahan yang diimpikan. Ayuh! Kita tukar mimpi menjadi realiti. Ayuh! Kita mengerah segala keringat diri meninggalkan dunia yang hanya, sementara.

Cara kita mungkin berbeza, bayangan kita mungkin tak sama. Tapi sekiranya shahadah itu menjadi titik pertemuan kita, maka berusahalah! Kita berada di jalan yang sama.

 Kerja itu adalah kerja, memerlukan masa, tenaga, dan harta. Tajdid niat, ikhlaskan hati. Sesungguhnya Allah bersama kita yang berusaha menegakkan kalimah tauhid di atas muka bumi. Maka adakah hasil yang kita inginkan itu setimpal dengan usaha yang akan kita lakukan?

Tentu sekali tidak! Sekiranya usaha kita hanya separuh hati. Usaha ala kadar maka hasilnya juga ala kadar.

Semoga Allah memberkati Usaha kita

22 April 2012


It is funny how two people who appear to have nothing much in common, after a few sittings together swapping manly stories about life and family, you found out that this particular person, has more than meets the eye.

"Hey, I did that too!" I screamed inside.

The people around me will see me as the quiet one, the good boy, the manja, the nerd, the one who knows little about life. Most of them, sadly were true. I am not easy with the tongue, I have been living inside my comfort zone for too long that I am appalled by the idea of doing something out of the ordinary. I don't have many stories depicted me as a boy who has little self control, most of the memories I had as a kid was the one with me sitting quietly in my desk at school doing schoolwork.

That's how lame I was.

I envied those people with their cute little stories doing stupid stuff as a kid not caring about any sort of consequences. Ack! I was always the snobby kid who focused on doing what my parents think was 'good'. Anyway, I regret nothing even though it sickens me knowing that there are people who painted me with this innocent image. Believe you me, I have done my share of stupid things, the only difference was I am clever enough to cover my tracks and I am very good in acting innocent.

O mankind, what has deceived you concerning your Lord, the Generous, Who created you, proportioned you, and balanced you? In whatever form He willed has He assembled you.
[82 : 6-8]
But that was not the point of this rant. I believe in the power of God knowing what is best for me. Some people have been 'bad' all their lives, and some have been a noble example for others since they were born. None of us know how we will die. There are stories depicting noble men and women who were obedient to Allah since the very beginning but ended up converting to christianity. You can google Aisyah Bukhari yourselves.

There are also, plenty of men and women who were once 'bad' in the eye of sharia; UAI, Yusuf Islam, Maher Zain, Sham Kamikaze, Abu Sufyan, to name a few but have made a greater impact to global society than any of us 'good muslims'. The only difference was that while some make effort to become a better man, others succumbed to their sins.  

Some of us are born to privileges that make us different to one another. Different backgrounds spurt out different personalities, different ways on dealing with things. For a person to deal with something differently from you doesn't mean he is wrong and you are right, because empathy is an amazing tool to be used to understand another person's point of views. Maybe at the end we will find that we have much more in common that we think. The world is beautiful, if is still within the limit of sharia why do we limit the beauty that we can enjoy?

Allah's grand design of this world include how He resembles each and everyone of us uniquely balanced out so that we can get closer to Him. We are a perfect blend of blessings and weaknesses that positions us perfectly to best serve Him. Besides, Allah says that He never burdens us with something we cannot bear.

So the points I am trying to convey are;
  1. Hidayah is Allah's to give and we are not in the position to judge whether one's place is either heaven or hell. The best we can do is to conform with the sunnatullah Allah has put upon this world, that's it.
  2. Si miskin mungkin akan lebih cepat kufur kalau dia diberi kekayaan. Si kurang cantik mungkin akan lebih mudah kufur kalau dia diberi kecantikan. 

When my heart was hardened
and my courses constrained
I made my hope a stairway
to Your forgiveness
My sin burdened me heavily,
but when I measured it
by Your forgiveness
Your forgiveness was the greater.

14 April 2012


Jauh sekali. Aku bukanlah yang terbaik. Kurangku banyak, baik dari sudut ilmu, agama atau medikal, juga sosial. Aku juga bukan antara yang indah mata memandang, bukan juga yang rajin turun padang. Entah apa yang ada pada diri ini yang mereka nampak lebihnya.

Tapi aku diberi peluang.

Kenapa ya? Kenapa dalam banyak-banyak manusia yang lebih ahsan di luar sana, aku yang diangkat untuk menjadi tenteraNya? 

Sungguh, banyak yang membuatkan aku terasa seperti mahu berhenti. Berhenti kerana bimbang kehadiranku hanya membawa mudarat; dan ya, ini sudah pun terbukti. Kehadiranku telahpun menimbulkan kudis. Akulah kudis itu. Terus-terusan aku menggaru, terus-menerus mereka menyapu ubat.

Walaupun hakikatnya, masih banyak yang aku belum mampu gadaikan.

Mungkin, sedikit-sedikit aku mengalah pada ketentuan-Nya, maka inilah jalan yang akan aku tempuhi.

Despite thousands of my wrongdoings, my weaknesses, my stink. Allah keeps pulling me. And I am yet to find the answer on how to become an asset for the deen. Kehadiranku, adakah membawa berkat atau mudarat?

08 April 2012

Tanah tumpah

 Oreo dan susu. Classic :)

Yesterday, Dr N made a brave statement about how she admired Malaysia, and I quote, as a 'real Islamic country' and actually wanted to change her citizenship and live in Malaysia permanently. Not once, but on several occasions did she make such statement.

Alhamdulillah, Malaysia is a majority-Muslim country and we are heading towards becoming an Islamic country.

Now, I understand her disappointment o Egypt; how the country is yet to achieve peace after  14 months of revolution, on how the political backstabbing and the ridiculous quarrels between even the Muslim politicians, on how the country is yet to stabilize either economically, politically, socially. She's been living here longer, and even those like me who have only been living here for merely three to four years can't stand the rubbish and basically the messed up administration running Egypt.

Last time I blogged about how ridiculously bad Egypt was, an anonymous wished me dead. I believe he or she doesn't live in Egypt, because his or her English was perfect. Grammar aku pulak, tunggang langgang.

But here's the truth; even a hardworking professional like Dr N declared her dissatisfaction with her blood-soaked country.

On the other hand, there are also Dr Nd, a young brilliant pediatrician on his way to becoming an assistant professor at the university, who once had his masters degree in Canada, chose to come back to his run-down country and made a living here instead of living in heavenly Canada. He sees the best of his country, for his children and he looks forward for a better future for Egypt, even if it takes 10-20 years to happen. 

So you see, like 90% of the world's population, I have always see the glass as half-empty instead of the other way around. But I am trying to change that. To Dr N, my country has her own problems. Our government is a corruption away from being just like the Mobarak regime. We are facing economical crisis, we have to deal with humiliating political bickering, incompetent ministers (Yes, I am talking about you, you dumbass Nazri), racial slurs, not to mention the degrading standard of Muslim's morals. Itu tak sebut kes-kes murtad, sekularisme, perkembangan pesat mazhab syiah.

Selagi Karbala menjadi tempat perkumpulan terbesar Muslim di dunia mengatasi Mekah dan Madinah, selagi itu aku akan sangsi dengan Syiah.

To me, there will always be another place better to live. The grass is always greener on the other side, isn't it? But would I change my citizenship and live in other country? No ma'am. I wish the best for my country and I present my body and soul to be used to make Malaysia a better place to live in.

Manusia ada dua jenis; yang suka mengomel dan yang berusaha memperbaiki masalah yang ada.

p/s : Besok exam end-round pediatrik. Doakan yang terbaik.:)
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