29 December 2010

End of 2010


2010 is near to its end. Unlike most people, I open and close my book on my birthday, July 18 every year. So, the beginning of a year like 2011 will be a mark to the second part of my book, where I reevaluate stuff and redesign my goals, because although I've set plans in my head, the plan usually went under the rug forgotten and left to rot.
So anyway, for every new year you just have to look back about how the world has treated you. Things you regret, things you've lost, things that have left you, things that made you feel special, things that show you that some glimmer of hope is there shining too brightly for you and your love, things that changed the world, and how you wish the new year will treat you.

It may seems ridiculous to some of us to forsee this kind of stuff, but this is how you appreciate time. Time is the only thing that we have to have some control on our own lives. If we lose time, we will lose everything else.

This is just me saying. Anyway, the beginning of 2010 was extremely excellent, but near the end it kind of sucked. Sucked to me personally, nationally and nternationally that made you say, ' what kind of viral stupidity has been infecting the world?' Why nationally? Bila Malaysia tangkap orang Syiah  macam syiah ni sejenis cult yang puja setan, bila keluar khabar-khabar angin yang sangat tak sesuai untuk orang-orang yang berpangkat menteri Malaysia, bila basically Malaysian politics is going deeper up his asshole. Why internationally? When a 100% Muslim country spent million of dollars to decorate a Christmas tree (read here). You don't even have rain, you dumbasses. So TIGA harapan utama aku untuk 2011 adalah :
  1. Supaya dapat at least Jayyid dalam finals Sem 5 dan Sem 6.
  2. Supaya dapat kumpul duit untuk Winter 2012.
  3. Supaya aku jumpa balik member baik aku yang 'hilang'.

InsyaAllah Kheir!

26 December 2010

Kerja tanpa Habuan


Kenapa nak kerja penat-penat tapi in the end tak dapat apa-apa? Habis duit, habis masa, habis tenaga untuk sesuatu yang tak benefit dekat diri sendiri. Kita penat-penat  syok sendiri tapi orang lain dapat hasil. I could leave anytime I want because I can, and there's nothing they can do to stop me. And believe me, they need me more than I need them.

Even so, itu bukan isunya. Seronok buat kerja bila dapat tengok hasilnya depan mata. Suddenly all the money, time and energy spent apparently for nothing were worthed after all. Even kalau orang tak nampak hasil kerja kita, sampai ada orang boleh kata aku tak buat kerja, (nak saja lempang, kau tak tahu apa-apa kau nak komen lebih-lebih) itu bukan yang kita cari : untuk dilambung tinggi sebab menyibukkan diri.

Anyway, be sincere in whatever you do. When you know that nobody sees what you've done, the beautiful ending will be there waiting for us who worked our asses off because we earned it, fair and square.

Finally, remember : discipline is of utter importance here. Yes I've lost abundance of time, but I do have a great deal left ready for use. InsyaAllah kheir, insyaAllah score finals because years ago, a British physician once said that the radio has no future, well we've proved him wrong.

I guess nothing is impossible with some hard work and discipline

p/s : Congrats Malaysia! A 3-nil win against Indonesia :)

18 December 2010

Sungguh sampah


They say that small-minded people discuss other people. 'Small-minded' a polite way to say 'dumb'. Yet how is it one would not talk about other people when people are all around us?

Maybe to discuss other people has different meaning to you and I. The people around you defines who you are. Your friends are the summary to your personality. They empower you to step up and become more than average. Most importantly, those around you are indirectly your teachers.

You learn from those around you. Such as, when I myself see this one person going through one of the most devious challenge of life itself, and for the better part of it he came through as strong and proud, as if nothing has changed at all, it made me think that what I am going through personally is total garbage.

Al-fatihah untuk arwah ayah beliau.

06 December 2010



Teringat zaman sekolah dulu time kelas Bahasa. Every once in a while the cikgu will give homework to do either rumusan, ringkasan or a simple 200++ karangan. I remembered how a torture every Bahasa class was, I was never a fan of the language eventhough I was born technically Malay. Even today I still prefer to write in English, which of course you may have noticed that this was not a language I proficient in either.

So anyway, the worst part of doing a karangan was when the title given was simply a dead-ass boring one. Karangan was where my menggoreng skills become uttermost useful yeah baby. So in the end, even after 20 years of using Bahasa as my first language, I am sad to say that I suck bad. Real bad, actually. I simply just didn't read and write enough, I guess. 

I blame the TV, they made Bahasa sound extremely lame :P

That was three years ago. That was when someone had the power over me to push me to write about something I have never considered to take space in my thoughts before. That was when I could pull off a three pages of 'kesan gejala sosial kepada masyarakat' in less than two hours. I used to loathe it back then, but today I kind of missed it. I missed the time when I was given a thought-provoking topic leaving me wondering to the endless possibilities of how I could solve a problem if given the opportunity. Well yeah I guess I'm just being optimistic.

Even if I was forced to do it unwillingly, what made it bearable was the thought that they made me think outside the box. They made me cross the borderline where I need to think about something else beside myself, and most importantly, they made me think.

Today, I am lost without words. Hundreds of times I tried to write something in this blog that only ended up with me leaving the page blank still after three hours especially bila ada orang kutuk blog ni boring haha. So, it comes down to this, it is very hard to think about something beside our petty problems.  By the way it is very ironic how as we grow older and supposably wiser, and as we started to mingle with society, we stop to appreciate the wondrous diversity coexisting around us and started condemning each other.

Dulu, orang bagi tajuk kerja kita berfikir. Sekarang kerja kita cari tajuk dan fikir. So, solusinya adalah banyakkan membaca dan timbulkan minat kepada sesuatu supaya otak terus terisi. Dunia terlalu sibuk untuk kita terus khayal dalam dunia sendiri.

Sekarang sedang membaca :  The 30 Principles of Moderate & Balanced Thought via Suhaibwebb.com :D
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