28 December 2009

Pictures with a thousand meanings

Salam people.
People are meant to say Goodbye
(credit to..?)

We start here

By then semua excited, dapat group baru.

Then this happened.
Ten times, to be exact.
Week after week after Eid break, and week again.

Finally, we've finished.

Goodbye all. Good luck on your exams. Let's see who'll got the highest Thesis marks :)
Remember, Iffah made a promise to Dr Azza for all of us.

Thanks Dr Azza Abdel Aziz, for your guidance.

Thanks all of you too,

Kelly (huhaaaa)

for being in the group with me.

10 December 2009

How To Build Self-Confidence

     Here are some Tips on How To Build Self-Confidence
  • Acknowledge Your Uniqueness.
  • Believe in yourself and know that you are one of a kind. In the words of Walt Whitman know:

    "That you are here--that life exists, and identity;
    That the powerful play goes on, and you will contribute a verse."
    There is no one else like you on this planet. No one looks like you, has the same talents, experiences or perspective as you do. You are unique and are therefore here to make your unique contribution. If we each focus on what we bring into the world to share, there can be no comparisons, envy or regret. We are here to "contribute a verse".
  • Give it Your Best.
  • When you do the best you can, with the best of what you've got, you can't help but feel good about yourself and that confidence comes through in everything that you do.
  • Persevere.
  • Everybody has setbacks and obstacles to contend with. Don't let them undermine your confidence. Treat them as opportunities to strengthen your resolve and then persevere.
  • Overcome adversity.
  • Overcoming adversity builds and strengthens self-confidence. The greatest songs, works of art and literary pieces have been written by those who have experienced the depths of despair, loss and emptiness and overcame them. Experiencing sadness and loss, and then rising above them, gives rise to hope and triumph. It makes you stretch and become more than you were.
  • Accomplish something.
  • Set goals for yourself and then push yourself to reach them. Self-confidence soars when you know you can do what you put your mind to. It makes you feel unstoppable.
  • Separate Yourself From the Event.
  • You are not what happens to you, nor how you believe others see you. In other words, you are not defined by what happens to you, nor are you defined by how others see you. You are who you choose to be - a person of character, dignity and self-confidence.
  • Confront your fears.
  • There's nothing that destroys self-confidence more than succumbing to fear. Everyone feels fear at various times; we're human, however facing circumstances with courage and poise strengthens character and builds self-confidence.
  • Good looks do not equal self-confidence.
  • Some of the most attractive people in the world are insecure and lack self-confidence. Marilyn Monroe was considered to be one of the sexiest, most beautiful people in the world, yet she lacked a positive self-image. She misguidedly allowed external factors to determine her self worth. Good looks help you feel good about yourself, but are by no means enough.
  • Learn how to give yourself a pep talk.
  • We all have our down moments, moments of doubt, confusion and uncertainty. When that happens, we have to learn how to restore our self-confidence. One way is to understand that everyone goes through such moments. Another is to remember past successes, visualize the desired outcome, and keep at it. Practice makes perfect.
Self-confidence is absolutely essential to achieving success in any endeavor. You acquire it by doing, learning, accomplishing and persisting. InsyaAllah.

30 November 2009

Mansurah's Politics : a Tom and Jerry chase

Salam people,

God, Mansurah's political atmosphere is getting murkier by the second. Honestly, this endless quarrel is very, very tiring. It is easier not to get yourself involved, but for how much longer will you lead a carefree, pointless life? At some point, we cannot run away anymore from our obligations. It is very irresponsible not to get involved, since I am, no matter how small, a part of the family too. And to some of you who are still coming to this blog for no apparent reason, you too, if haven't yet, get yourself 'infoed', if that is a word :)

I am myself are not well-informed, haven't yet fully grasp the very core of the problem. Nevertheless, I ventured around, collecting stories from both parties. It is very important not to listen to only one side of a story, avoiding biased opinion that only champions its own stand and belittles the opposite's. To hear, and understand both point of views, whom from now on I shall call Tom(click) and Jerry(click), is utterly and mostly important.

Finally, you can then differentiate between the hidden and obvious, between Haq and Bathil.

So, in the end, I find both Tom and Jerry have their rights and wrongs. Yet it is unfair if Tom does not even stop to hear Jerry's explanation, and Jerry cannot blame Tom for everything that is happening between them. Jerry, being the weaker opponent, wants justice and balance. Changes need to be made, since Tom has always been controlling, strict and inflexible. The current condition in Mansurah Enormous Family doesn't allow for strict enforcements. It is more important to educate, to allow people to grow closer to Tom before they judge it indifferent from afar.

If we fail to apply the simplest form of cooperation at this level of our lives, how can we adapt living in the bigger world, where people are far more diverse than what we see now?

It is not the case where Jerry is being a stubborn ass, but when Tom reluctantly ignore Jerry's demand, there is no other way, but to rebel. Well, not rebel in the sense of bringing down Tom by force, but through the only way Jerry can : by collecting the silent voices and make them be heard. Jerry too, need to be more lenient with Tom, and accept any good things Tom may bring to the table.

Yes, Jerry too should consider the position Tom is stuck in, but do we want yet another year of waste? Life is too short to wait for another year to make changes; and who knows how bad things are then.

So we need representatives from all sects of Mansurah's big family, allow simple yet effective programs, and insyaAllah, God willing, we will be a bigger, colourful, amazing family with bright looking future together during our stay in this godforsaken part of the world. :)

Again, I am not as well informed as the next guy. But I do have my own opinion, like every man out there, I'm just a blogger :)

04 November 2009

It is not length of life, but depth of life.

Salam people.

First of all, Thank You baba for this new internet line. May God bless you and your family. Second of all, after three weeks away from the blogging world, I need to speed up things as in to start the usual self-reminder like I usually do immediately.

ONE. Begin the usual Egyptian routine a.s.a.p., as in the waking early for Subuh, the morning Quran recitation and the endless time spent in mosques.

TWO. Start studying IMMEDIATELY. As in today, Nov 4th 2009, five cases have finished, yet I have only revised the first. Exam is around the corner, man, pick up your pace.

THREE. This year, try to find more Egyptian friends, and learn their language properly :). Quoting from someone I know, "kalau masuk 2nd Year tapi tak pandai cakap arab lagi aku rasa bodoh"

FOUR. Spend less money. The hardest to do so far! Haih. Like I said, who says money can't buy happiness? I'm miserable about it.

FIVE. After two months, I will lose at least 5kg. That is a promise I would like to keep.

SIX. Spend more time calling Malaysia. Plan this well, since the international call rate is damn too expensive.

SEVEN. Do not repeat last years' failures!

Beside all of these rubbish, I would like to live more. Live, as in enjoying every pieces of seconds granted by God upon me, and spend every bit of it to be meaningful. To enjoy life while following the guidance laid out by the Hands of Allah, that is my new motto :)

It is not length of life, but depth of life. 
Ralph Waldo Emerson 

13 October 2009

PBL Group 3

Salam people.

My new group for semester 3 is very unnerving. People have started to show off their true potential, I think, after two semesters of playing and fooling around. This Arab girl, whom I pronounce her name as 'Neuron' was really giving her all, and literally leaving us behind eating her dust if we, the Malaysians do nothing to rise to her level.

Which means a lot more time will be spent studying, because showing off is a must in this new group.

Even so, that is not the half of it. The new tutor, Dr Azza, this timid middle-aged and considerably beautiful professor of the pathological department will actually participate to make sure we all strive to perfection. According to her, we will be having some sort of tests before the start of our PBL 1 session, from what I understood the test will be about the last two semesters. Here, in front of this ancient PC in this internet cafe, I pray to You, God, I wish I misheard her. Please, God, bless us with the gift of abundance of time.

Apparently, she did the same with her last group, and she was satisfied with their final results. :((

This semester we will learn more about pathology, and unlike the last semester, much less about anatomy. So there is a happy sight beside this could-be hazardous semester. We actually started going to the hospital, and we are finally allowed to visit the hospital outside of the schedule. As if I will go in any way.

Haha. I really hope this will be the worst of my personal vampire robot Nazis who are also zombie apocalypse could go. Pfft, exaggerate much?

One thing for sure,  with a lot to do, a lot more time will be spent on the bed, sleeping. It is one of those thing when your head is telling you to do the exact thing you should avoid from doing. Like blogging, for instance.

29 September 2009

A disgusting yet cool, cyst.

Salam people.

Do you know what that is? I'm gonna tell you anyway, so hush up.

It is a 3 kilogram fluid-filled cyst, which has been 'living' inside of my brother's wife for at least 2 years. The two-hour long operation was such a success because according to the doctor, this is the first time for a long time that they actually took out the thing without breaking it, so all the contents of the cyst is still intact when the brought it out.

Part lame, part disgusting, also partially amazing though.

Thank god it is just a cyst, which means that it did not harm the body physiologically, unlike cancer cells. Here's some basic differences between the two.

Cancer is a class of diseases in which a group of cells display uncontrolled growth (division beyond the normal limits), invasion (intrusion on and destruction of adjacent tissues), and sometimes metastasis (spread to other locations in the body via lymph or blood)

cyst is a closed sac having a distinct membrane and division on the nearby tissue. It may contain air, fluids, or semi-solid material

Anyway, Raya is done and it is time to start packing. Am going back to Egypt next Tuesday. For the record, this year is the raya-with-the-in-laws for my family, so no one is home. Perhaps next year would be better.

18 September 2009

Hari Raya Wishes

I am not good with photoshop etc, so all I can do is copy a URL and paste it here. So sad, but convenient haha.

Today is 8:30 in the morning where I sneaked out the modem from my brother's room so that I can update my blog. I have to do it while he is sleeping because if he is awake, he will hog the computer. And my family is too cheap to install a wireless modem. That means that all Raya wishes has to be done when possible, not tomorrow which it should be done. Haha.

Apparently I am that sad. :)


Untuk kalian yang bergelar keluarga,
Untuk kalian yang pernah sekolah bersama,
Untuk kalian yang menuntut di Mesir bersama,
Untuk kalian yang menduduki ICDL bersama,

Untuk Mama, Ayah, juga my bros,

Untuk sahabat-sahabat;
Kak Moon, Zaty, Amin, Naz, Pika, Baby, Gin, Luth, Moaweya, Farid(Bon), Faiz Aminin, Abbad, Muaz, Bun, Afuza, Fahmi Huweidi, Husni, Bai...
dan sape2 yang tak tersebut sebab mengantuk ya amat,
dan sape2 yang for some reason beyond my understanding come to this blog,

Selamat hari raya Aidilfitri 1430 H
Aku mohon maaf kalau ada salah silap,
sengaja atau tak,
Moga Ramadhan memberi manfaat.

YEAH. ICDL da settle :)

13 September 2009

Identity Crisis

The identity is "a subjective sense as well as an observable quality of personal sameness and continuity, paired with some belief in the sameness and continuity of some shared world image. As a quality of unself-conscious living, this can be gloriously obvious in a young person who has found himself as he has found his communality. In him we see emerge a unique unification of what is irreversibly given--that is, body type and temperament, giftedness and vulnerability, infantile models and acquired ideals--with the open choices provided in available roles, occupational possibilities, values offered, mentors met, friendships made, and first sexual encounters." (Erikson, 1970)

An identity crisis is when an individual loses a sense of personal sameness and historical continuity.

Actually you don't need a dictionary to understand the meaning of the phrase 'identity crisis'. It is a well-known phrase describing most of us today, because in some way, we all have our own share of hypocrisy. It is hard to be someone that you're not. To pretend that you like something for the sake of others when deep down you despise it real bad, to give in to social pressure and changing your appearance in order to feel accepted, or sometimes, being someone that you're not for that person you badly craved for attention before.

Because life is not as easy as it seems, better avoid from making it harder as it is. Life is about making choices, therefore to have good perception, to have fair judgment, and to understand the foundation of your faith are very important in making the right choice.

We all have that hypocritic side in each of us. As the basis of our faith is fragile, our rigid self fail to recognize and differentiate the priorities of life itself. Yes, it is corny by the way, yet although how ridiculously lame it may be, 'priorities in life' is one of the main things we fail to do as a man.

An example, we fail to recognize God as above everything, and no matter how we say it, our actions do not describe the element of truth in what is said.

So, let's arrange our priorities of life together, or mine, at least, because I'm the only one who is doing this right now. Hahaha.
  1. God, Allah, and everything that follows.
  2. Family 
  3. Friends
  4. My study
  5. Myself.

Little that you know that this list is partially true, but that is another whole story. Yet God MUST be above everything else in each our list, and that is unquestionable by any of us. It all sums up to every little thing that we do, it is for Him and no one else, and when God and Friends clash, God must be prioritized.

And to YOU, I know that it is hard, but to be ridiculed by men is better than being ridiculed by God, and I happened to believe that you are stronger.

Hai orang-orang yang beriman hendaklah kamu jadi orang-orang yang selalu menegakkan (kebenaran) karena Allah, menjadi saksi dengan adil. Dan janganlah sekali-kali kebencianmu terhadap sesuatu kaum, mendorong kamu untuk berlaku tidak adil. Berlaku adillah, karena adil itu lebih dekat kepada takwa.

This has nothing to do with the thing I wrote. :)

10 September 2009

Syurga & Neraka

Di sebuah negeri yang melaksanakan dasar 'Membangun Bersama Islam', kerap kali pihak berkuasa tempatan menjalankan pemeriksaan mengejut di premis-premis perniagaan dan kompleks beli-belah, untuk memastikan para pekerja di premis berkenaan menutup aurat.

Aku tak pasti berapa jumlah denda yang dikenakan sekiranya didapati melakukan kesalahan, tapi selalunya mereka akan diberi amaran bagi kesalahan pertama, dan didenda jika didapati masih enggan mematuhi garis panduan yang ditetapkan.

Lazimnya dalam setiap operasi sebegini, seorang ustaz ditugaskan bersama dengan para pegawai pihak berkuasa tempatan. Tugasnya adalah untuk menyampaikan nasihat secara berhemah, kerana hukuman dan denda semata-mata tidak mampu memberi kesan yang mendalam.

Dalam satu insiden, ketika operasi yang dijalankan sekitar 2005, seorang gadis yang bekerja di salah satu lot premis perniagaan di Pasaraya Billion telah didapati melakukan kesalahan tidak menutup aurat.

Maka dia pun kena denda la...setelah surat saman dihulurkan oleh pegawai PBT, ustaz ni pun bagi la nasihat, "..lepas ni diharap saudari insaf dan dapat mematuhi peraturan..peraturan ni bukan semata-mata peraturan majlis perbandaran, tapi menutup aurat ni termasuk perintah Allah. Ringkasnya, kalau taat segala perintahNya, pasti Dia akan membalas dengan nikmat di syurga..kalau derhaka tak nak patuhi perintahNya, takut nanti tak sempat bertaubat, bakal mendapat azab di neraka Allah. Tuhan Maha Penyayang, Dia sendiri tak mahu kita campakkan diri ke dalam neraka..."

Gadis tersebut yang dari awal mendiamkan diri, tiba-tiba membentak "Kalau Tuhan tu betul-betul baik, kenapa buat neraka ? Kenapa tak boleh sediakan syurga je? Macam tu ke Tuhan Maha Penyayang?"

Mungkin dari tadi dia dah panas telinga, tak tahan dengar nasihat ustaz tu.. dah la hati panas kena denda sebab dia tak pakai tudung. Ustaz tu terkedu sekejap. Bahaya budak ni. Kalau dibiarkan boleh rosak akidah dia.

Setelah habis gadis tu membebel, ustaz tu pun jawab: "Dik, kalau Tuhan tak buat neraka, saya tak jadi ustaz. Berapa sen sangat gaji saya sekarang. Baik saya jadi tokey judi, atau bapa a yam .. hidup senang,  lepas mati pun tak risau sebab gerenti masuk syurga. Mungkin awak ni pun saya boleh culik dan jual jadi pelacur. Kalau awak nak lari, saya bunuh je. Takpe, sebab neraka tak ada. Nanti kita berdua jumpa lagi kat syurga..Kan Tuhan tu baik?"

Gadis tu terkejut. Tergamak seorang ustaz cakap macam tu? Sedang dia terpinga-pinga dengan muka confused, ustaz tu pun jelaskan:

"perkara macam tadi akan berlaku kalau Tuhan hanya sediakan syurga. Orang baik,orang jahat, semua masuk syurga .maka apa guna jadi orang baik? Jadi orang jahat lebih seronok. Manusia tak perlu lagi diuji sebab semua orang akan 'lulus' percuma. Pembunuh akan jumpa orang yang dibunuh dalam syurga..perogol akan bertemu lagi dengan mangsa rogol disyurga..lepas tu boleh rogol lagi kalau dia nak.. takde siapa yang terima hukuman. Sebab Tuhan itu 'baik'. Adakah Tuhan macam ni yang kita nak? Awak rasa, adil ke?"; tanya ustaz.

"Ah..mana adil macam tu. Orang jahat takkan la terlepas camtu je.." rungut si gadis.

Ustaz tersenyum dan menyoal lagi: "Bila tuhan tak adil, boleh ke dianggap baik?" Gadis tu terdiam.

Ustaz mengakhiri kata-katanya: "Adik, saya bagi nasihat ni kerana kasih sesama umat Islam. Allah itu Maha Penyayang, tapi Dia juga Maha Adil. Sebab tu neraka perlu wujud. Untuk menghukum hamba-hambaNya yang derhaka, yang menzalimi diri sendiri dan juga orang lain. Saya rasa awak dah faham sekarang. Kita sedang diuji kat atas dunia ni. Jasad kita bahkan segala-galanya milik Allah, maka bukan HAK kita untuk berpakaian sesuka hati kita. Ingatlah; semuanya dipinjamkan olehNya, sebagai amanah dan ujian..semoga kita dapat bersabar dalam mentaati segala perintahNya, untuk kebaikan diri kita jugak"

copy-paste dari entah mana tak ingat

08 September 2009

ICDL International

Berikut merupakan perbualan ringkas yang diubahsuai mengikut kekuatan memori dan kreativiti semasa.

ICDL : Salam, saya dari ICDL International, nak mintak maklumat ni.
Me : Salam ye, sila kan akak-suara-cun.
ICDL : Nama penuh awak?
Me : Fikri Indra Prastanta bin Didi Indra.

- 2 minit selepas ini dipenuhi dengan mengeja nama satu persatu -

ICDL : Alamat?
Me : No 48....sori, maklumat confidential tak boleh didedahkan. :)
ICDL : Tarikh lahir?
Me : 18 Julai 1990 . So sekarang awak kakak ke adik?
ICDL : No telefon?
Me : Err, no henpon ke no rumah? No henpon ni lah die.
ICDL : hehe, saya main dial je, tak ingat pulak nombornya. Hehe.
Me : Hehe, ok2 013XXXXXXX
ICDL : Okay, nationality- awak Malaysian kan?
Me : Err..Malaysia lah. hehe.
ICDL : (dia bantai gelak besar, cuba bayangkan) sori ye, manalah tau, hehehe.


Everywhere I go, every form I fill, every person that sees my IC. The same thing happens. For the last time, I am Malaysian-lah!

Although, after tens of times facing the same question over and over again, I gave up, wore a big smile whenever it happens, and nod cheerfully. So yeah, my name is unique, and am proud of it :D

02 September 2009

We do not empathize, instead we judge.

If I were born a non-Muslim,
Would I be interested in Islam as I am today?

If I were raised to support the winning side as in a fight,
Would I be supporting the weaker team as I am today?

If I were a woman,
Would I tolerate wearing the hijaab under the scorching sun?

If I am given a day to be the Prime Minister,
What sort of changes I will bring onto the table?

If I were raised any differently,
Would I become what I am today?
Would I be a fanatic or a realist?
Would I be supporting my belief as today?

A lot of questions left unanswered, because we were never on the losing side. We never hear both sides of a story. We judge, and we do not empathize.

As the world is growing older, slander becomes worse and one just cannot decipher the truth anymore. It hurts to care, but not to care is an act of a fool. And alhamdulillah, I was born in the best of condition, as a believer of One God Allah and a follower of Muhammad pbuh. Even If I do question my stand, at least I am in a safe zone :)
Behold, you received it on your tongues, and said out of your mouths things which you had no knowledge; and you thought it to be a light matter, while it was most serious in the sight of God
(24: 15)
So it comes to this, am I a fanatic or a realist?

27 August 2009

Kartika Sari Dewi Shukarno

Kartika Sari Dewi Shukarno. The name itself is strong enough to catch your attention. But forget the name, this 33 year-old woman has brought herself comfortably into the limelight with a BANG, I must say, when she was caught drinking beer by the religious authority. And not only her own, Malaysia too, and whether Malaysia's image is being jeopardized or improved internationally, is another different story to be told. 

She was sentenced to pay up to RM5000 fine and to receive six strokes of cane. I must say KUDOS to you, miss Kartika for accepting your punishment like a......man? You know what I mean. Not only she implied that she deserves the punishment fair and square, she requested to be caned in public. Imagine, it is bad enough that I was caught drinking liquor, which according to my belief is the mother of all evil, why would I humiliate myself more to request such a thing?

Well, maybe I am not as noble as her. Wait. I am NOT as noble as her.

The case is down-right interesting. It is amazing to see various groups, organizations, even ministers would give a damn about something as simple as this. First of all, she confessed to all the charges against her, and second of all, she REQUESTED the public caning, which although something that extremely rarely happens, is her right after all. It is odd to see that this one particular organization who usually supports total women's right to stand against Kartika's decision.

I have to agree that she did not make a wise decision regarding her sentence, but the point is didn't she's the one who requested the damn thing?

The act of caning is widely considered as brutal, uncivilized and unnecessary. What the world refuse to understand is that the sentence is not an Islamic law. It is a made-up Islamic-like law that was created based on human logic . If it is an Islamic law, it would have to be at least 40 strokes of the cane, with some matters to be considered. 

At least her story helps to educate people about Islam a little bit, so that's a plus right?

21 August 2009



Click and Enjoy!
and a Happy 52th Merdeka celebration :)

15Malaysia is a short film project. It consists of 15 short films made by 15 Malaysian filmmakers. These films not only deal with socio-political issues in Malaysia, they also feature some of the best-known faces in the country, including actors, musicians and top political leaders. You may think of them as funky little films made by 15 Malaysian voices for the people of Malaysia.
Please enter and make yourself comfortable.

17 August 2009

Ramadhan O Ramadhan

Salam people,
It seems that it has been only a couple of weeks I have been fattening myself up in Malaysia. Little that I know, in about five days, we will be in Ramadhan again. The same thing goes round and round the bloggers' circles again. The same thing about preparing yourself for the upcoming hyped-up holy month of Ramadhan. I did the same thing too, coming from a teaspoon of religious background. Yet although the same thing has been brought up again, I personally have not taken the necessity to actually DO it.

So, insyaAllah, this Ramadhan. pray to God, I shall do the best and after it finishes, I will come out all brand-new. InsyaAllah, InsyaAllah.

Better start 'jogging' because I need to 'run' as fast as I could in Ramadhan.

What to do in Ramadhan?
  1. Recite all 30 chapters of the Holy Book Quran.
  2. Finish memorizing the first Chapter of the Holy Book.
  3. actually LOSE some weight, instead of gaining some more.
  4. attend all praying calls from Subuh until Isya. Except maybe Maghrib, hurm.
  5. Doing tahajjud at least 5 times a week.
  6. Having less sleep. Please, please Allah, let this one succeed.

p/s: what do YOU wanna do during this coming Ramadhan?

05 August 2009

Bad driver day and more

Yesterday was a day to remember as a Bad Driver day. Just as my licence got expired, my awesome driving skills [yeah] also apparently, gone. I would like to remember August 4 every year as the day I should pay more attention on the road, or getting yelled at. Haha.

For one thing, when I reversed the car from th house, I almost hit a school kid. Those midgets almost got killed by me, so listen here kids, no running around me when I am driving.

Then, I didn't stop at a zebra crossing when another school kid was crossing it, and what is worse was that the traffic light was at red. If I was a second later to come out of the junction [before arriving at the zebra crossing] I would savagely hit a girl. But don't blame me, blame the makcik behind me who kept honking at me, even when the road was busy as hell.

After that, I got yelled at by a Nazri Aziz look-a-like. If I remembered it correctly, he was yelling 'bodoh! tak nampak ke line kuning?' I was not paying attention, because I realized 5 seconds before that that I should have stop before the yellow line. Haha sorry lah pakcik, aku blur sikit harini.

So yeah, after breaking almost a dozen of rules, I almost kill two school children, got yelled at and gained a lesson of a lifetime. Which is :


By the way, Bukittinggi was awesome :)

Malim Kundang, people. Indonesia's version of Si Tanggang.

The mountains, the icy cold water and the paddy fields. And me, of course :)

Tasik Maninjau.

Me holding the roof from falling.

A f*ckingly enormous crack was formed when an earthquake hit Bukittinggi some hundred years ago.

Jam Gadang, local landmark.
Literally translated into Jam Besar.

24 July 2009


Today is Saturday, July 25th 2009; exactly a week after the wedding. My parents have yet to stop talking about how the wedding was a success blaa blaa blaa at dinner while I'm sitting beside them. Not only that this would not stop for at least another week, they would continue rambling on and on [and on] about the same thing over and over again, and I am forced to listen to them, because it's either that or starve.

After the chaos of preparing for the event has finally ended, I jokingly said to my mother,

"Mama, when I got home from Egypt after six years, I will bring along with me possibly two or three important things. First, a medical degree; two a  wife and maybe three, a child."

And she replied my joke with a  big fat 'jangan nak mengada-ngada.'

To continue messing with her, I added that then no one will be bother to prepare complicated giftdoor doorgifts, and it would be cheap, as I am just gonna marry the unlucky bitch girl in Egypt.

Same answer.

Then I said to my dad the very same thing. His reply was more interesting though. "Selagi tak ada title, tak payah kahwin."

I was secretly laughing with the idea of me getting married. Of course I don't want to marry anyone yet. For a start, nobody would want to. Why do I want to be married at such a tender age, sacrificing what's left of my free life to be burdened with a responsibility that I could get in another few years' time when my future looks more promising?
There are some people though who thinks that it is great to marry before graduating. It is not probably my business, it's their life. But I really want to understand their point of view and reasonings on why the hell would they want to get married so soon. I did try to imagine myself in their shoes, and I think I've come out with some strong reasons.

First, the girl is pregnant. Hahahahahaha.

Second, his or her hormone levels are going up and down and out of control. So it's either get married or pre-marital sex. An understandable reason, yet some deep thinking needs to be done.

Third, they got this grand life plan that they are so eager to start because there is just lots to do after graduating, like changing the world. Actually, this is a good reason though.

Fourth, when two people are just too in love with each other, why wait when you know it's the best thing to do?
Again, it is not my business to tell people when is the appropriate time to get married. God has intended a specific plan for each of his creation, and I have no right to say that it's not good enough. So for those who want to have a wife [or husband] before a degree, please make sure that you intention is right as marriage is not something that one can toy with.

For example, for myself, if I ever want to be with somebody, i would think am I prepared enough to spend my life with someone forever and to protect her from any harm? She is not a kitten where I can dump her at the nearest trash hill when I am bored with it, this is a real person with needs and feelings.

There is this trend among oversea students to get married while studying. Again, make sure your intention is right.Today is not the 15th century. Today is a time when money is very important, where sex offenders may live just right next door, where there are people who kills other people for fun.

Marriage is not easy. We have seen or heard countless stories about men and women twice our age got divorce just because of some minor misunderstanding. And who knows, the same thing [naudzubillah] might happen to us too.

p/s : Never underestimate the importance of listening. - Dr J Dorian, Scrubs.

20 July 2009

July 18th, 2009

Today was one heck of a day. Besides that I'm turning 19 this year, today was also my brother's wedding day. Besides of feeling joyful for turning a year older [yeah], the arrival of this day marked the official end to a week [and more] of misery. No more important things to do. Now I can finally hang out, enjoying my holiday doing absolutely nothing.

Oh jika beginilah Malaysia, baik aku bosan di Mesir, at least aku boleh pusing-pusing Cairo.

A reminder to those who live outside KL, if you ever feel that you 're not so sure where you're heading, do head out earlier than Cai did, so that if you ever lost your way, you would not be taking too much time and come late to something you promised to be arriving at two.

Thanks for coming, Naz, Faisal, Bai, Acad, Amin and Nizar.

Oh. by the way, terima kasih Naz, sebab bagi hadiah novel. aku dah taknak speaking dah dengan kau okay :)

27 June 2009


The mind is a powerful tool.
If only one knows how to use the mind,
He may be the best a man can be.

To exercise the mind,
To guard it from envious assailants,
To organize the unlimited knowledge,
Oh how it could change the world!

Let the mind roam free,
Let it explore the deepest, darkest corner
of the unlimited world of imagination
Let the mind wander to where no man has ever been before,
Let the mind play with facts,
To consider and to differ of what is righteous and corrupted,
To play with possibilities,
And let it decide
The obvious truth that everyone chooses to ignore.

Let the mind grow strong,
Let it become independent,
Or at least,
Never let it unguarded
As many are looking for even the most minute hole
To bring down this powerful source of strength in the world.

Be warned,
Guard the mind from unwanted influence
Guard the mind from being controlled
By those people who think that they may know better
It is you, only you who could decide for yourself.

Occupy the mind with knowledge,
Occupy the mind with wisdom,
Prepare the mind for the worst,
Because, as you may see, not many have survived this most vital test of God
Because, as you should know, many minds are more corrupted than pure.

The mind is a powerful tool
Never let it rust, never let it forgotten
Because once it has become like mine, you would wish you were never born.
p/s: this is not a poem :P

22 June 2009

8 months of living in Egypt

After almost a year of living in Egypt, I have learned not to trust people, even if he is the closest, the most spiritual or even if he is the imam of a local mosque.
If you for whatever reason decide to come to an Arab country, be warned that your days will be filled with people trying to con you in any way possible, cunningly making his way to gain more profit, manipulating his words and bullying you until you have no other reason but to give in or lose the deal.
Remember, even if he is an imam, even if he memorize the Quran, even if he swears in the name of Allah here and there, NEVER to judge people before you get to know him better. Terrible things I have endured in the past week alone, and I shall never forget some of the things these desperate people did to us.
Us, meaning the Malaysians.
8 months of living in Mansoura, I found that they are loud, rude, stubborn and mostly liars. Okay, maybe I exaggerated a little, but one thing for sure, 70% of them filled the criteria with flying colors.
Fine. Some are nice, no doubt. We are not angels ourselves, in fact some of us are more disgusting than they are, and if this is a competition, our own filth would beat theirs in a landslide.
Let's just hope that we shall encounter this minute group of people during our stay in Egypt. Fingers crossed, eh?

Bahhh. Four more year to go people. We shall enjoy the beautiful culture while we can. :)

06 June 2009


Remember those days when you are wandering round the house, doing nothing much with your life, just letting time passes by with nothing worthwhile to do?

Well, can't exactly forget, today was one of those days.

When I was in primary school, or all of us, for that matter, I remembered one particular infamous quotations being plastered on every wall in each classroom, painted with golden colours and cut with creative designs. It was always the usual same old thing, which in time, ironically wears off on people.


And at the end of the day, usually we would recite the same thing over and over again, the tasbih kaffarah and surah al-'Asr. Even though I am sure not more than half of the classroom exactly understand what we mumbled accordingly, but we did it together nonetheless.

Today, after about almost a year and a half finishing school, still we recite the same thing after any formal ceremony. We are constantly reminding ourselves to appreciate time, not to let it go to waste.

Time is precious! Time must be well-spent!

I wonder how all those things we practice ever have any effect at all. Still we would be the same person we are a year ago, doing things at the very last minute, staying up late when we know tomorrow morning would be wasted, and as if during the night we are doing something beneficial. If you call facebooking is beneficial, smack yourself in the face three times.

The prayers we do are nothing more than blind faith.

Why though? Shouldn't we become better as we grow older? Personally, I think if today never happen, I wouldn't miss a thing by tomorrow. If today doesn't exist, it would not make any difference. I did nothing today. The 24 hours given by God was ill-spent.

Sometimes we dream big. Sometimes we fantasize about being on top of our game in anything we do; a great doctor, even a preacher, with lots of money and a comfortable life. I wonder if we realize that to achieve all of those, sacrifice needs to be done. And lazying around the house is not a sacrifice.

I wish to be better. I wish to be awesome. I also wish to be amazing, but I'm not doing much to be that way.

If you know me, meet me after two months this thing is posted. I am sure I'll be the same person I am today, which is a sad thing. :(

Please Allah, make me better tomorrow. I want to contribute. I want to be worthy to You.

p/s : Happy 55th birthday, Mama :). I dedicate You Raise Me Up by Josh Groban to you.

04 June 2009

As two of the major papers have finished just today, I am trapped between feeling relieved of miserable. Relieved, as in exam is halfway through; and miserable as in the chance for to to resit the papers are quite huge.

Err, I mean MASSIVE.

Do take note that the exam was hard, at least most people said so. And yeah, as usual being an incompetent, lazy student that I am, I didn't finish revising the syllabus.  So yeah, apart from feeling like crap, I also felt that I got what I gave, and apparently I gave too little. Who knows.

Fine. What is done is done. I cannot change the things I answered in the answer sheets, therefore the only thing left to do is pray.

Pray and pray and pray and pray. May God lays His hands on me and change the fact from 'I most probably will fail the exam' to 'I almost fail'.

Screw MCQ ans short essays. We shall focus on OSCE for the next few days.

On a totally different story, I met with a beggar today, like most days of living in Egypt. Here in Egypt the beggars are extra hard in their role of asking for money, especially of you are a 'boya-boya' from the other side of the world. They will pull your shirts until you give them money, they will push their tissues or whatever to you, even if you already have one, and they do not ask much, but nothing less than a pound would be nice. 

If you ever give them like 50cents or so, they will politely ask, ' what the hell is this?' [In Arabic, of course].

Well, as most of us already know, I am a good person deep down. Really, I am. Seeing the beggar (a she) asking me money, I politely say, ' I have no money', because I really had no money at that time. At least I had no change, and I was not going to spend 20pounds on her seeing that I am dead hungry, and that was all I had.

Oh, I did have some money, 50 cents, and after giving her that, she asked for more. Typical, typical. Suddenly, my good 20pounds fell from my pocket. She saw it, and wrestled it from me. Wrestled. And that is how I lost my money I was going to use to eat at Nusan.

Oh well, it was your day. May that 20pounds makes you fat.

Besides, it is fun to see how people act on some occasions. Sometimes our true colors can only be seen in certain situations.

All life is experiment. The more experiments you make the better.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

*Told you I had no money.

11 May 2009

"Givers are better than receivers"

Sometimes it is hard to pity the less fortunate. Such as, when you see a full healthy grown-up man begging you for money, you can't help but think, 'how pathetic could you get?'

Is there no more jobs available for a man to do that made him sinks so low to a level he must beg [bug] people for money in front of mosques? 

I believe that if you are healthy both physically and mentally, and you are not in a god-forsaken war zone or anything that might match that, you should be able to live on something you earned through your sweats. Not by begging, not by cheating, not by stealing, not even by taking-advantage-on-students-who-are-going-to-take-exams-and-must-see-the-effing-jars-desperately-to-score-although-students'-privileges-allows-them-to-see-the-jars-as-they-paid-the-fees.

Yes, the museum's ammu asked for money from anyone who wants to see the jars. That's even more pathetic than healthy street beggars.

Ah! I guess not all people has been given the blessings of a comfortable life. I am in no position to judge the grand work of the Almighty, aren't I? Allah, He has His reasons on everything that happens.

One of the many things I think my mother thought me well is that no matter how hard life seems to be, always remember not to get anyone around you involved. Or 'jangan sebab kita susah kita menyusahkan orang lain'.
"Givers are better than receivers"

 By the way, Happy Mothers Day. :)
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